One of my first entries in this blog is about 30-something singles. I was a 30 something single woman and I understand the emotional ups and downs that one faces when faced with the relationship question.
You wonder when the ONE is going to appear. You feel the eligible men/women seem to be lesser and lesser. It also feels that everyone else around is either married or getting married. When is it your turn? You try to go out more or socialize but sometimes it just seem fruitless. You avoid family gathering or wedding dinners for fear of the question - "When is it your turn?". You avoid going out with couples so that you don't feel left out. You sometimes feel lonely and desperate. You snap at your mom whenever she asked you about your love life. You hate CNY cos when your relatives give you an angpow they will say...this is the last year ok. And probably the list goes on.
Sometimes it feels like there is no light at the end of tunnel but have faith, I am sure everyone who desires to find the ONE will eventually meet your own the ONE. I did.
Ok back to the topic of 30-something singles....since I was only writing from the female perspective and the feeling is that there are no eligible men out there. I am encouraged to find out that there are single men out there who also feel there are no eligible women out there. So there is hope, it is a matter of time and fate to bring these single people together.
I received a note from Quagmire recently after he read my "When you are 30 something..entry.
Here are the edited version of his note -
I am single 30-something Chinese guy and my social life has dwindled to zero.
I am not looking for anything specific (let that happen naturally) but I just feel when you finally have the means to try new things suddenly all your friends around you are gone. Life is so boring.
For guys it is terrible because once a friend has a girlfriend or married he won't be able to hang out with the group anymore. I am the only one left. So I am just looking for people to hang out with and hopefully find someone special.
In his note, he wrote about taking risks, doing something different to make new friends. I just felt a sincere honesty from him. It is not desperation or anything like that. It is just reaching out to do something about what he wants.
Quagmire - if you are reading, thank you for your note. I applaud for you taking the effort. I urge you to continue what you are doing, taking risks, making new friends but importantly enjoy the journey, enjoy the things you are doing. I know that you want to get to the end result (of finding someone special eventually) and sometimes it can feel frustrating when you are not there yet. But remember you will be happier if you focus on enjoying the journey of your life, appreciate time you spent with friends and family, and make effort to try new things and make new friends. And one day when you are not even thinking about it, your special someone will just appear and things may happen so fast you won't even remember the wait.
If you have a website or FB, send me a link and single friends can connect with you.
5 comments:
Hello quagmire - you appeared! How are you? Anyway how does the link below work? Can't seem to get in...do u have a blog?
strange...can't seem to find you though :(
Hey quagmire - as per your request, I have not posted any of your messages but however I seem to think you are a pretty closed person despite wanting to meet more people. It will be difficult to direct friends to you if you profile seem pretty closed up even on FB.
quagmire - Just be a bit more open, if you are really serious about taking a new challenge and meeting new people. You even hide yr FB profile whereby people can only send you a message. Why so closed? Be yourself and don't be afraid.
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